This is another poem which has a story behind it.
I won't provide names, but it is, indeed, a tragedy when any person is abused; when hopes and dreams disappear as quickly as sand slips through ones fingers.
It is painful to write of such an occurrence, and one I wish I could have avoided...but God had other plans.
Just as a person weeps when they are being abused, God weeps right along with them.
His heart breaks each time a member of His creation attacks another.
The unfairness of such an action...
There are just no words to adequately describe how a victim feels. No words to describe the pain...the shame...the fear...the regret...and the "if only's" which come as an onslaught...attacking the person once again...bringing guilt along with it.
I have written this poem in the first person for a couple of reasons.
It makes the situation seem more real to me if I am included in what's happening. It's as though the attack is happening to me and not someone else. It becomes personal.
The other reason is that I want you to feel the same as I do when you read it. I want you to empathize with this person, as I do...and, if you are this person, take comfort in the paragraphs towards the end.
Realize that Jesus desires to help you. He isn't ashamed of you. He doesn't love you less. He has His arms spread wide-open waiting to hold you in His embrace.
The tears don't have to blind you, the shame doesn't have to eat at you, and, more importantly, you don't have to bear this burden alone.
Please e-mail me with your thoughts. I promise I will not share your name or information with anyone. I've been helping and counselling people for several years.
Innocence
I was so young and innocent
My heart was filled with joy.
I thought when I grew older
I’d be married and have a boy.
I wanted to be a teacher
To teach others about love.
I was always thankful
And served my Lord above.
As I grew a little older
Now, almost fifteen.
My life suddenly changed
I knew I’d never be a queen.
To me, my life was over
I was going thru the motions.
Quite often I felt like mixing
And taking some fatal potion.
Thank God, this feeling passed
In what seemed a drawn out season.
Now, once again, I look
At living for one reason.
I want to tell people
That Jesus really cares.
If it wasn’t for His love
I would not be here.
Copyright 1993 Norma Budden
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HEALING:
And now, I live, and love, and learn;
Since death's temptation I did spurn!
I walk, and talk, and love, and laugh -
my soul feels like it's had a bath!
For Jesus came and lifted me
out of the tossed and angry sea;
a sea which I had stirred of late -
thru anger, fear, and bitter hate.
And now, when backward I do look,
I see a life I have forsook;
A life which caused me bitter shame,
but I am healed, in Jesus's Name.
(c)opyright by michael ingram
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